This year I’m going as swine flu for Halloween. Why not? It’s topical. It’s all in the news and it’s scaring America more than any devilish creature from this world or the next.
But what if I really am a human incubator for the dreaded H1N1?
How many people would I come in contact with on an average Halloween night?
How quickly could I spread this agent of terror throughout the land?
Well, lets see.
Tomorrow I will be swine flu and I have 300 viruses on hand to spread.
Actually this virus is a 3x5 sticker of the H1N1 virus. Anyone I come in contact with for more than a few seconds gets a sticker. A handshake gets a sticker.
A hug gets a sticker.
A smooch definitely gets a sticker.
And if I go bobbing for apples at the local elementary school and the whole place gets a sticker.
The possibilities of spreading the virus are endless.
This is one of the joys of being a vector.
So if you’re out on Halloween and you see a sick pig handing out H1N1 you just may get infected.
But there’s no need to panic. My girlfriend will be dressed as the H1N1 vaccine. So just talk to her and you could get the antidote. But probably not. She’s not a people person. She’s just in it for the money.
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